WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

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    SBR

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    WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by SBR on Fri Mar 14, 2014 7:00 pm

    Before I start this review let me tell you a little about where I was at in life in 2006. I was 16 years old, going on 17. I was a junior in high school and I just quit the football team because my career in football was going nowhere, I was a pretty big music prude/hipster at the time as well thinking only what I liked was real. I was probably on some form of a TNA message board with you guys. Can't really remember. I'm getting old. But at this point in my life I was still watching WWE every week (yeah I didn't have a girlfriend) it was just that TNA was my #1. And in these reviews, all 16 of them (how do I have a girlfriend now?), I will try and figure out why that was. Was WWE that bad? Anyway, we kick it off her in early January from Albany, NY.

    New Year's Revolution 06 (Raw only)

    -Hype video for the show featured some wrestlers talking about how terrible it is to be in the chamber. This included a short interview with Benoit. I WAS NOT PROPERLY WARNED WWE NETWORK.

    -Commentary team for the evening, Joey Styles and THE COACH. Sweet deal.

    -Ric Flair © vs Edge w/Lita for the IC Title
    Ric Flair was the IC Champion in January 2006. I shit you not. Edge has the MITB, I remember that. Lita and her boobs look good. Flair actually hit the sledge to the head from the top rope. Edge is in trouble here. Crowd loves Ric as he puts Lita in the figure four. WOW AND EDGE BUSTS FLAIR OPEN WITH A BRIEFCASE SHOT. By gawd that was brutal. ANOTHER ONE. Headshots were still a thing in WWE in 2006 clearly. Flair retains via DQ, match wasn't really good but technically there was nothing wrong with it.

    -Kurt Angle promo, for some reason Daivari was his manager. "I'm not a really big fan of the black people." This is when WWE wanted everyone to cheer Cena and tried hard to get them to do it.

    -Trish Stratus © vs Mickie James for the Women's Title
    This is the set up for their eventual Mania match that I am actually looking forward to watching again. I don't remember them having this match beforehand though, lets see what it's all about. They got a video package. How times have changed. Mickie grabbed Trishs tit, then they botch a hurricanrana into a power bomb spot. Trish retains with the Chick Kick, pretty good divas match, better than most of what you see today. I mean they threw a bunch of FOREARMS at each other.

    -Maria interviewing HERSELF. Gregory Helms interrupts. Where are his sugar babies?! I've watched WCW Greed 2001 too recently. Oh! Shelton and Mama Benjamin! My favorite. WWE apparently had this thing called instant access on wwe.com, Edge blew it off but Lita said she'd do it. A true second screen experience.

    -Jerry Lawler vs Gregory Helms
    This is a PPV match ya'll! Apparently this feud is happening because Lawler made some Hurricane jokes that Gregory did not like. 2006 was a weird time, this match is getting a LOT of time. I'm bored guys. Lawler beats the "young upstart". Yes they kept calling Helms a young upstart.

    -More from the instant access room. There was a Trish/Lita stare down and some Mickie James shenanigans talking about hot sweaty bodies. More mamma Benjamin. She doesn't like the catering, they're serving PBJ and chips. Viscera is getting up on that right now! Jeeze.

    -Triple H vs Big Show
    This bad boy got a video package. Big Show has the biggest cast/most ridiculous cast I've ever seen on his right hand. How will HHH overcome these odds?! This match sucks guys. I don't know if you would have guessed that. After spending most of the match working over Big Shows broken hand there is a ref bump, shenanigans, a sledgehammer shot and a pedigree. HHH wins. Shocking. DUD.

    -Carlito and Masters are going to team up to win the title. Good luck with that bros.

    -Shelton Benjamin w/Mamma Benjamin vs. Viscera
    Shelton showed up to the building not having a match, but thankfully Viscera trying to bang his mom got him on the card. Lawler has joined commentary. This match was LONG as well. Shelton won after two purse shots (one right in front of the ref) and a kick from Shelton.

    -Vince and HBK promo, I forgot they fought at Mania this year. Grrrreeeattttt.

    -Bra & Panties Gauntlet Match
    "The last diva with her clothes, will be the winner" Well that was well said. The ref had to tell Lillian to get out of the ring, that was funny. After eliminating Candice and Torrie, Maria is eliminated by Victoria. Mae Young came out and ripped off her shirt. RIP Mae. Mae and Moolah eventually take off Victorias shirt. I'm shocked I've written so much about this match. Ashley wins and after took off her clothes voluntarily, because the internet.

    -Shelton is in the instant access room. Him and momma are happy.

    -Elimination Chamber match, John Cena © vs Shawn Michaels vs Kurt Angle w/Daivari vs Kane vs Carlito vs Chris Masters for the WWE Title
    Apparently Kane and Big Show are World Tag Champions so that explains nothing. Kurt Angle came in and started suplexing everyone, the first truly awesome thing on this show. HBK got busted open, I gotta say I don't miss people bleeding. Cool spot alert: Angle has Cena in the ankle lock, out of nowhere HBK super kicks Angle for the pin. Kane eliminated by Masters and Carlito, yay! HBK is basically just laying in the corner bleeding out. Carlito pins HBK, that will do tons for his career! Remember when it was the Chain Gang instead of the Cenation. Good times. Poor Carlito and Masters never had a chance, especially since Carlito double crossed Masters. Cena wins the best match on the show, clearly.

    WAIT! THAT'S VINCE'S MUSIC!

    -John Cena © vs. Edge w/Lita for the WWE Title
    YES! YES! YES! I remember watching this and just marking the hell out. Great end to such a shitty shitty show. "Behind every great man, there is a slut" - Jerry Lawler. Goodnight Jerry.

    Final Grade: D
    This show would have gotten a F if it wasn't for the finish. The best match on the show prior to the main event was Trish vs Mickie. Think about that. But the Edge thing was great and I remember literally losing my shit watching it. It still holds up on tape. I hope Edge and Lita have a live sex celebration tomorrow on Raw, that would be cool.
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    Swarles
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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by Swarles on Fri Mar 14, 2014 7:21 pm

    I'm so glad there will be 15 more of these.


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    Vipes

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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by Vipes on Fri Mar 14, 2014 10:25 pm

    Recap Boy going back to his roots.

    SBR: Sifting through shitty WWE PPV's so you don't have to. Godspeed sir.


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    dragondragon

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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by dragondragon on Fri Mar 14, 2014 11:56 pm

    Sbr I will tell your tales to my adopted children.

    You're the man.


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    Stroke

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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by Stroke on Sat Mar 15, 2014 12:07 am

    If you make it to Armageddon, you are all that is man.


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    BornToFail

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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by BornToFail on Sat Mar 15, 2014 2:27 pm

    Good luck to you sir, hope you can survive through the year


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    JustSkiff

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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by JustSkiff on Sat Mar 15, 2014 8:12 pm

    Not one "Shelton Benjamin Rules" line?
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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by JustSkiff on Sun Mar 16, 2014 3:57 pm

    Also I still don't know why everyone thought 2006 was the worst year. The Smackdown only ppvs were all pretty good 2006.
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    WhoBetta

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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by WhoBetta on Sun Mar 16, 2014 5:36 pm

    2006 gets a bad rap. There were some really great hidden gems that year.

    Not a great year for wrestling... But not the worst...


    1995... Now that was some bullshit.


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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by CapitalTTruth on Sun Mar 16, 2014 7:05 pm

    Yeah my buddy and I were talking about great years and bad years. 1995 was among the worst we could think of. Christ almighty that was bad.


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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by WWF Attitude on Sun Mar 16, 2014 7:20 pm



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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by SBR on Mon Mar 17, 2014 12:46 am

    Royal Rumble 06 might come tomorrow.


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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by Xero on Tue Mar 18, 2014 1:20 am

    WhoBetta wrote:2006 gets a bad rap.  There were some really great hidden gems that year.

    Not a great year for wrestling... But not the worst...


    1995... Now that was some bullshit.
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    2kNikk

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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by 2kNikk on Wed Mar 19, 2014 6:02 pm

    I liked 2006 and that sound like a B to B+ show to me Sad
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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by SBR on Wed Mar 19, 2014 6:04 pm

    2kNikk wrote:I liked 2006 and that sound like a B to B+ show to me Sad

    I'm so sorry Astil.

    Also Skiff claims that the SmackDown PPVs were good. We will see. I'm halfway through RR, I needed a break after Boogeyman/JBL.
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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by JustSkiff on Wed Mar 19, 2014 9:18 pm

    The SmackDown ppvs were good.
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    Slayer

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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by Slayer on Thu Mar 20, 2014 7:27 am

    This reminds me of last summer when I tried to watch every WCW 2000 PPV and Nitro episode. However, a lot of stuff got pulled down from YouTube and I could only find select segments of certain shows.

    Now that the WCW PPVs are finally available on the Xbox app, I going to follow through on at least watching the PPVs in order.
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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by WhoBetta on Thu Mar 20, 2014 3:41 pm

    Hey skiff....

    Were the Smackdown PPV's in 2006 any good?


    Smile


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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by JustSkiff on Mon Mar 24, 2014 12:49 pm

    He said I claimed they were good. I was clarifying it as it is a fact.
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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by SBR on Sun Apr 13, 2014 11:58 pm

    BTW, I finally finished Royal Rumble 06. Took about three weeks. Review up soon.


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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by dragondragon on Mon Apr 14, 2014 9:02 am

    SBR wrote:BTW, I finally finished Royal Rumble 06. Took about three weeks. Review up soon.


     cheers 


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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by SBR on Mon Apr 14, 2014 3:22 pm

    WWE Royal Rumble 06 (Raw & SmackDown)

    -Pretty good hype video, kind of makes me forget how bad New Year's Revolution was. We are live from Rome…I mean Miami. Roman theme this year.

    -Crusierweight Championship Open: Kid Kash © vs. Funaki vs. Jamie Noble vs. Nunzio vs. Paul London vs. Gregory Helms
    Helms, who is a Raw wrestler is allowed because he is a former champion. OOF. London did a SSP to the outside with a bunch of the guys and no one caught him. AND THEY REPLAYED IT. Jeeze. Helms wins with the shining wizard on Funaki. Very good opener, enjoyed it a lot. Now we wonder what this means that a Raw guy won the title.

    -Teddy Long and Vince backstage, Vince gives him the night off. Then he flirts with Torrie, Victoria and Candice. Orton and HHH draw their numbers, Orton is excited. "Torrie, you mind opening your box for me?" - HHH. HHH is not happy with his number.

    -Trish is warming up to be a referee. Mickie wants to be friends but Trish's music hit. Mickie loves Trish. Trish is a homophobe apparently as she ran away.

    -Mickie James vs. Ashley. Trish Stratus is the Special Guest Referee
    "Very technically sound is Ashley." Sure Joey. Trish is a really fast count on the outside. I also have no idea why this match is happening, I don't think this is a #1 contenders match. Match ends with Mickie giving Ashley the worst power bomb off the second rope of all time, Ashley landed right on her head. Weird, long match that advanced the Mickie/Trish story. I guess. Weirds.

    -Gregory Helms is in the Instant Access room with Josh Matthews who looks just like The Miz and scared me. Vince is in the back with the ladies again. Candice shows Vince her tit tattoo. Victoria shows him a fake "WWE DIVAS" tramp stamp. Big Show, Rey Mysterio draw their numbers, Rey is doing it for Eddie.

    -JBL w/Jillian Hall vs. The Boogeyman
    This is on PPV ya'll! Boogeyman ate Jillians "cancerous growth" off her face. I remember the growth I DON'T REMEMBER HER HAVING CANCER. JESUS. Boogeyman is a hero. Boogeyman threw up worms all over Jillian. I mean he saved your life, you owe him, whore. Mercifully this match was VERY short. Boogeyman wins with the pump handle slam. Celebratory worms for everyone.

    -Vince with the ladies again. Mamma Benjamin! Mama "goosed" Vince. Shelton is very happy with his number, he's going to throw HBK over the top rope. Melina is very upset about her working conditions on Smackdown. She's probably talking about Batista. MNM draw their numbers. Vince is going to enjoy the Royal Rumble NEXT with the ladies. Vince asks if the dog has a tattoo and Torrie says "yes it says Vince" and shows Vince the dogs vagina. Vince is shocked.

    -Royal Rumble Match
    The Spirit Squad interupted the rules and did a Royal Rumble cheer. So weird to see Dolph Ziggler as a cheerleader. Anyway, to the match! HHH and Rey start the Rumble 1&2. Some notes on the first 10 minutes, HHH was a heel last PPV but is sort of working face here. Weirding me out. The Coach got a slot, good usage of a spot. I forgot Slyvan was a thing. Triple H eliminated Kane and Show (still tag champs) at the same time. Booker T is wearing long tights, weird. Tatanka is a surprise entrant, crowd actually popped and did an indian chant. A LOT OF MIDCARDERS IN THIS MATCH. Like, not really enjoying this. Up to #18 and it's Eugene, I'm sort of bored. Animal is the next surprise entrant, former Magnificent Seven member. Ok, some talent is starting to enter this match. With that said the next guy out is Masters. Entrant 29 is GOLDUST! Only seven years until he becomes the greatest wrestler in the world. Vince is out! Shane eliminates HBK. Final Four are: HHH, RVD, Rey & Orton. It took an hour for this match to get good. Rey wins! Good moment, overall bad match, didn't enjoy it.

    -Trish and Mickie in the Instant Access room. Trish is very passive aggressive towards Mickie. Makes me sad.

    -Malenko, Chavo and Benoit congratulate Rey in the back, Edge is a buzzkill. Lita's tits look nice tonight. Hall of Fame worthy.

    -Edge © w/Lita vs. John Cena for the WWE Title
    John Cena spaceship entrance! Check out where we talk about this on a recent episode of talkIMPACTradio. Shocked this isn't the main event. They're wrestling with Cena's entrance confetti in the ring. It's distracting to say the least. There was nothing wrong with this match, was probably the best on the show. But it really had no second gear, they went from Edge working over Cena, a Cena hope spot, Edge back in control, botch Lita interference and then Cena's finish. Long live Edge's 28 day reign.

    -Todd Grisham tries to get Edge's thoughts on being a transitional champion, Egde and Lita almost fuck him up. Jim Duggan shows up and calls Lita a ho. Seriously.

    -Josh with Kurt Angle. Standard promo. Daivari apparently switched sides. "Mark Henry you suck"

    -Kurt Angle © vs Mark Henry w/Daivari for the World Heavyweight Title
    No video package. No awesome Mark Henry music. Somebody is not gonna get they ass kicked. This was before I truly appreciated and loved Mark Henry. Let's see how I view this match now. Kurt Angle had turned face and joined Smackdown since we last saw him at New Year's Revolution. Crowd is not into this match. Babyface Kurt Angle low blowed Henry and used a couple unprotected chair shots to the head. Henry kicked out though. I have no idea who I'm supposed to cheer and neither does the crowd. Angle undid a turnbuckle and used it and then rolled up Henry. What a baby face.

    -The Undertaker is here! He is riding a white horse! Undertaker motions that he wants the World Title then WWE photoshops some lightning and the ring collapses. You should have been in the Royal Rumble if you wanted the World Title bro. Cool ending a guess. The lightning was really cheesy though.

    Final Grade: C-
    I guess this was a little better than New Year's Revolution simply because the two title matches weren't terrible. But I hated this show as well. I meant to do more than one show per month but I had to stop and start a lot on this show. I'd also like to note the crowd was terrible, they popped for nothing. It was like they were at a Miami Heat game. Well, anyway, next up is No Way Out.


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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by dragondragon on Mon Apr 14, 2014 3:47 pm

    ill have to dig out the rumble anthology and watch this soon. Now that you brought it up that Rumble match seems a bit romanticized just because of the great story of Rey winning the title he got because dead friends.

    Surprise Duggan will always be number 1 Duggan.


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    Re: WWE Network Time Machine: 2006 revist

    Post by Swarles on Mon Apr 14, 2014 4:31 pm

    I never realized boogeyman was such a hero. He should still be employed for being such a selfless superstar.


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